ABCD
Fortune Cookies

Person 1: "The ones you love will never let you down"
Person 2: "Your self-confidence is well placed."
Person 3: "Seek nonviolence in everything you do."
Instead of "In bed", I've found that fortune cookies are often more improved by appending "EXCEPT in bed."
{{Alt-text: "You will have hot, steamy, sweaty sex... IN BED!"}}
'You will have hot, steamy, sweaty sex ... IN BED!'