ABCD

More substitutions that make reading the news more fun Debate → Dance-off Self driving → Uncontrollably swerving Poll → Psychic reading Candidate → Airbender Drone → Dog Vows to → Probably won't At large → Very large Successfully → Suddenly Expands → Physically expands First second third-degree → Friggin' awful An unknown number → Like hundreds Front runner → Blade runner Global → Spherical Years → Minutes Minutes → Years No indication → Lots of signs Urged restraint by → Drunkenly egged on Horsepower → Tons of horsemeat {{Title text: Within a few minutes, our roads will be full of uncontrollably-swerving cars and our skies full of Amazon delivery dogs.}}